This cracked me up.

The other day, I bought the famous (or infamous) "Buns of Steel" Video. Due to my schedule, I can't do aerobics on Tuesday and Thursday, so I wanted to get a quick video so I could squeeze in a short workout for my non-aerobic days. And, being Greek, I'm sure my butt is destined for bigness ... so might as well get an early start and try to stave it off with toning. Sure as hell know I'm not going to give up my Ben and Jerry's ice cream. Dammit.

Please run out and get this video. Even if you have no intention of exercising. Even if you get out of breath observing the leaves whirl ... watch this video for its pure entertainment value.

"Buns of Steel" was made back in 1987. I didn't know that. However, it become readily apparent as soon as the tape started. The instructor was early 1980's. Think the lovechild of Olivia Newton John and John Ritter circa Three's Company - before he gained weight but after he grew a beard. I can't remember the instructor's name. I'm sure it was something warm and fuzzy like Carl or David. Anyway, there were headbands and leg warmers EVERYWHERE. It was like someone vomited "Flashdance".

Oh. My. God. I could not stop laughing. And that was before he said anything.

Then he started talking. He kept saying how hot I looked and what a great body I had. I wasn't sure if I was watching an exercise tape or amateur porn. Amidst his "Oooohs" and "Aaaahhs", I began to think that this man was having far too much fun working his inner thigh. Then he exclaimed , as he pointed to his crotch area, that he could feeling "something stirring" down there! I thought he was going to strip naked at any second. My god. These things should come with parental ratings. Who knew aerobics could be so erotic.

Except he so wasn't. This man wasn't sexy at all. He had this creepy camp counselor/overly touchy troop leader vibe going on. The kind who has far too many "sleepovers" and is a tad too fond of the kids. But maybe it was his beard. Beards always freak me out. Vans and beards, that is. Give me the willies.

Damn, I had so much more to write. This video is ripe for mockery. Alas, Buffy is on in 15 mins ... so I guess you'll have to go get the video and make up your own jokes.

And don't worry. You will. Many, many jokes.

But, in its defense, it really does work. My butt does hurt.

And, like the Mr. Creepy Camp Counselor/Buns of Steel instructor would say ... Ooooooh, it hurts so good.

Oh yeah, baby.

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