2003-02-20
I got the best fortune from a Chinese cookie last night. It said:

"You've spent your life writiting the Introduction. It's time for Chapter One."

I don't usually look to my takeout to provide me wisdom about how to live my life but ... I have to say ... for a cookie - this one was pretty right on.

There have been major turning points in my life - catatlysts that propel me forward ... closer to the place I am meant to be.

I didn't see them as catalysts when they happened but now, looking back, I can see how crucial my decisions were then to get me where I am now.

Not saying now is so spectacular ... but, given the options, it could be much, much worse.

My parents dying, moving to Miami, losing my virginity, breaking up with my first boyfriend, coming home, falling in love, getting married ...

In each situation, I could have chosen differently. I could have stayed with my first boyfriend, even though we weren't right for each other, because he was all I knew. And we were very comfortable together. We made each other largly miserable with occasional bouts of sweetness ... but we were each other's habit.

And when we broke up ... Truthfully, I couldn't see myself with anyone else. This was the worst breakup of my life. And I thought I was going to literally die of heartbreak.

But I didn't. It hurt for awhile. Really, really hurt. But I got so totally over him. And I went on to date many more boys. Which eventually led me to my husband.

If I never would have broken up with my ex, then my life would have invariably taken on a different - much less pleasant - path.

I could have lied instead of telling the truth. Ran away instead of staying and fighting. Given up when I thought all hope was gone.

But I didn't.

Usually. :)

I was always presented with a choice.

I look at my life like a boardgame. I can't remember which game it was ... but there was a game that you rolled the dice and you picked a card (I think) ... and it determined how many steps you took and if you moved backward or forward. The whole goal of the game was to reach this certain place on the board.

And then you win.

Sometimes, you would pick the right card and advance ten steps.

Sometimes, you wouldn't pick a nearly as right card and have to go back three steps before you could advance five.

And sometimes, you would just plain pick the wrong card and have to go backward a whole lotta steps.

You could always get to your goal ... however, depending on the choices that you made, it would take longer or shorter.

This is my life.

I have all these opportunities for advancement. I'm picking cards everday. Because I really want to win this game.

So sometimes, I choose incorrectly. And I am left to tread a little water.

But then there are times - especially when it counts - when I choose correctly. And I get propelled forward. When I hit jackpot.

Okay, so maybe I'm a little behind of schedule. There were a few days/months/years when I felt like all I was doing was going backwards.

So maybe it's taking me a little longer than I initially thought.

This is why the fortune cookie was so profound to me.

Just last night, I was thinking about a couple we are having over for dinner on Saturday. They are in their mid 20's and incredibly, incredibly successful. Right out of college, their parents helped them open up a cute little boutique. The boutique did so well, they added on a restaurant next door the following year.

They are so young and so together.

Now they are buying a custom-built three hundred thousand dollar house and planning a summer get away to somewhere tropical. Just for fun.

Their weekends are spent skiing, or rockclimbing, or snowboarding.

Ours are spent studying and doing housecalls to help build our client base.

One day we will build ourselves our dream house. And one day we will have tropical excursions.

But not today.

Right now, we've just been writing the introduction to our lives. And, apparently, it's one of those LONG introductions with a foreword and everything.

So it can seem like it's taking forever. And I get a little frustrated.

But we're just about to get to Chapter One.

It's about to get good.

Whereas some people's lives are short stories, mine is War and Peace. Very lengthy and drawn out.

It might take me a little longer to get to where I want to go ... but, you know, I have to say I don't really mind the ride.

It's a little bumpy at times but the scenary's been great.

In fact, I might even prefer the long way around.

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