2003-03-26
Everyone keeps telling me that war is necessary.

I think there is confusion about what is and isn't necessary for survival.

Breathing is necessary. Water is necessary. Cable is necessary. (just kidding) Actually, no, I'm not.

I seriously think I would wither and die without the Learning Channel. And Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

But war ... I think that war is seldom a necessity.

War results because we lack integrity.

I see it as a fundmental problem. Country A can't believe that Country B will do the right thing. And Country B can't believe that Country A will do the right thing.

Because both countries are headed by people whose political position relies on their ability to deceive.

I'm speaking in generalities ... but it's very much applicable to the US-Iraq situation.

I like to believe that we always fight on the side of good. I like to ... but I don't. This war isn't about Iraqi freedom - although I strongly oppose what Sadaam has done to his country. If it was about freedom then we wouldn't raise the American flag each time we won a battle. We would raise the Iraqi flag.

It's not suppose to be about occupation or ego ... but liberation.

I watch the news religiously as of late. My head spins as I see our tanks storm across enemy lines. My heart breaks when I hear about another soldier dying or another village bombed.

I don't believe that to not support the war is un-American. Just as I don't believe to support the war is American.

What the hell does "American" mean anyway? It seems to me people use that word very often to guilt others into acting a certain way. To make them believe and say what everyone else wants to hear.

Personally, I thought being "American" meant the right to free speech. The right to say what you believe without fear of being silenced.

I thought being American was about being free.

Silly me.

I have struggled with this war immensely. I couldn't take a stand because I was torn. Torn between the cries of the Iraqi people to stop this oppression and my own personal distaste for violence.

I struggled because I didn't know what to believe in. And this is something I needed to take a stand on.

Now, I have come to my decision. After thinking and watching and contemplating what everyone (including my president) tells me.

I never did agree with going against the United Nations. It was created for a reason. To maintain international peace and security. So that countries wouldn't just decided to start invading other countries at whim.

We are a part of that organization. Hell, we helped found the damn thing. We had a code. Bounded by our word. By our integrity.

Then we went against all that. We decided to break our word. To abandon our code. To destroy our integrity.

This action ... I never agreed with. But still, the war itself, bothered me. I couldn't decide if it was necessary. If it was the only way to dethrone Sadaam and free the people of Iraq.

Then the war started. First supposedly to combat terrorism. Then, suddenly, everything changed. Now, it is "Operation Iraqi Freedom".

Seemingly overnight, we became humanitarians.

This was the clincher for me. This is what cleared my eyes.

I saw that I had been played. It wasn't about terrorism or freedom. There is some other agenda that I'm not privy to.

The president wants us to support the war. So, first, he fills his speeches with rhetoric about the "war on terrorism" to summon our rage against the horror of September 11th. Then, to legitimize his blatant disregard for international policy by going against the UN and invading Iraq, he switches his motive for war to a mission to end oppression and to free Iraq.

Suddenly, anyone not supporting our troops and this war is deemed anti-American. Because we are at war (even though those who were against it never had any power to stop it), we are all expected to unite and push our differences aside. To no longer vocalize our objections because we need to present an united front.

For our troops, they tell us.

This reeks of a guilt trip to me. And an obvious attempt to control the masses.

Let me be clear here.

I admire our soldiers loyalty to our government. I deeply appreciate their courage to stand up and defend our country. I am humbled by their willingness to lay down their own lives for the lives of others.

I support their humanity. Their dignity. Their bravery.

But I do not support the war.

Every night before I close my eyes and drift to sleep, I pray for our soldiers, their soldiers, the American people and the people of Iraq. I pray to whatever god wants to hear me. I pray that this war ends soon. Not for political reasons ... but because, as I type this, millions of people are holding their breath. Waiting for a phone call from their loved one to say they've made it another day. Waiting for the next bomb to drop. Waiting for the sounds of gunfire to stop. Waiting for all this pain to end.

This is how we are united. Not in support of war but in the consequences of it.

Here and in Iraq - mothers, sons, fathers, daughters, sisters, brothers, husbands and wives ... are all waiting for a soldier to come back home.

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